Dear Zeda,

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost two years and were even talking marriage. We however, broke up a few weeks ago after I found out he has been cheating on me. He says that he doesn’t care about the other woman and has ended things with her. I don’t know whether to believe him but I really miss him and feel I have invested so much in that relationship. Should I give him another chance? – Confused woman

Dear Confused woman,

I am sorry about your situation. Getting cheated on is never fun and I’m sure you are in a lot of pain. This is a tricky one as yes, there are cheaters who reform but more often than not, they keep at it but try to hide their cheating ways better. Taking back a cheater is also psychologically difficult as you can’t help but not trust them. You need to be very clear from the beginning that he must do the work to mend the relationship and win your trust back otherwise it will end up driving you crazy as you wonder if he’s still cheating on you. A cheating boyfriend can be a rollercoaster. The most important investment you can make is not in a relationship but in yourself. Make sure you are not making him a bigger priority than your well-being as you come to a decision. Good luck!

To have your Ask Zeda questions answered, email


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here